Once the years stack up it is all too easy to allow your mind to wander to the past. This is common amongst elderly folks and I recall wondering why my Grandads lived in bygone times when I was a young adult. Since the spirits made themselves known to me in June 2016, and my Mum passed with advanced dementia in August the same year, I have found myself doing exactly this. Not really old, I’m in my early to mid-fifties, my salad days still lie quietly composting in the corner of the garden of my mind, and I find myself turning them over looking for fertile soil. A Spiritual Awakening is like being on a rollercoaster on steroids: add into the mix a death, menopause, troubled relationship with child, discovery that immediate family is not as appears – nor friends, financial crash – failed business, illness and diminished finances and a person finds themselves keen to take stock and put their life in context: yet, there comes a time when the past no longer serves you.
Since my earliest awareness of self, I always knew that I was different from those around me whilst not understanding the how and why. I never quite fitted. Bubbly and full of fun I was popular but side lined, overlooked and bullied. People were always drawn to me but soon exhibited jealousy and tried to destroy me. This has been the pattern of my life from young childhood through to recent times which find me now having pulled the plug on most relationships I still hold dear.
Having dissected and picked through the tripe of my life I see a recurring theme of being misunderstood, harshly judged, undermined and more recently dismissed as a loser despite obvious evidence to the contrary.
And this: because I am a free spirit in the purest form imaginable.
I am a person who has, to their own detriment, lived life on her own terms and been left, uncharitably, to lie in the bed of her own making. This judgement is unwarranted and small minded; it takes no account of the true nature of an individual and their right, whatever, to be appreciated and valued. Nor does it acknowledge their god given gift to be different. Pertinently, it also overlooks the truth that it is those deemed headstrong, wierd and rebellious that most often are instrumental in pushing society forward, onwards and upwards.
Matthew, my Guardian Angel – yes, we all have at least one feathered friend on high who has our back, tells me I have many enemies who resent my resilience and, despite my never having actively sought to harm them, still bear malice towards me. This I find quite astounding. I am not one to hold a grudge and I struggle to understand such long-term animosity, especially as it was I that was smote, so often in the story, not them.
Reality is created through energy. Thought and deed are the fuel that turn the wheels of manifestation. Negative thoughts on a person, whether by self and/or others, can decimate their ability to achieve their highest good and I realise that, for more years than I care to count, I have been handing over my individual power and adding fuel to the embers of resentment already smouldering against me. The Universal Subconscious Mind acts on the dominant thought, in this case pain/suffering/resentment/jealousy/hate which are all erroneous and create evil in varying degrees. I have been unwittingly complicit in my less than desirable, demise. I have been assisting my enemies and self-sabotaging by endlessly regurgitating and gorging on historic slights and smites!
In the early hours Matthew came to talk to me and said;
‘Now listen Linda.’ His favourite way of starting any conversation!
‘You have spent much time contemplating your past but it is now time to turn the page and move forward. I know that you feel lost; that you sense that your previous life is done and that you are awaiting your new life to begin and this is true. For a long-time you have been thinking about all the pain and suffering you have endured at the hands of others which, whilst not horrific, has had a highly damaging accumulative effect on you but, I am now telling you that you must put all of this behind you. You have much to look forward to and work to do and by living in the past you are indeed self-sabotaging and playing into the hands of the dark who wish to extinguish your light. For many years they have meddled in your life sending agents to derail and disrupt you but now is the time for this to stop. You have a unique opportunity to enjoy a second life: at a time when most people are winding down into old age. Your future is to be exciting and successful beyond your wildest imaginings and you are to do great work for humanity. You are therefore to imagine yourself sitting in a wonderful library surrounded by many beautiful books and, when you find yourself thumbing through your book of ‘The Past,’ you are to purposely cross the room and place it in a dusty, forgotten corner. You are then to cross the room and pick up a brightly bound book, touched by sunlight, entitled ‘The Future’ and start to write, in the theatre of your mind, the life you so desire. By doing this you allow the Universal Subconscious Mind to become aware of your intention to succeed and, with your affirmations, things will speedily shift. You have much to do and can no longer waste time on a past that did not serve you well.’
His words rang true and, I believe, are relevant to all.
(Wo)man has a tendency to wallow and dwell on the past and forgets to enjoy and live in the moment, whilst consciously imagining an illustrious future.
This piece is highly personal but my hope is that, my navel gazing helps you gain a little clarity on your own precious life and serves you in some small way.
I wrote about affirmations here. They are key to successful manifestation and you would be wise to take a mo and read this short piece; as much of what is written and sold by manifestation ‘experts’ is overblown twaddle!
Meanwhle, should you fancy quotidian Word From Spirit – Daily Guidance From The Unseen Realms, direct to your inbox please signup here.
Be Happy xox
(Since November 2018 my writing is truly collaborative with spirit as I am now a channel for them and charged with bringing truth and hope to humanity.)